hope and hair

well...last night i had this crazy dream that me and my friend jamie were washing our hair ( in a sink or something...) and she was washing her hair and big clumps of hair were coming out of her head so she was warning me about being careful when i wash my hair because big chunks of hair were really coming out of her head,....so in the dream i proceeded to wash my hair and big chunks were falling out.....so i shared that this morning was my friends at our prayer meeting and Audrey informed me that that means i am stressed.
so then they prayed for me, Got some encouraging words, some pictures...and some challenges.....one of them was to Rise Up and Bless the Lord...and to remember that God knows me more..and that i am the not-forgotten one...and to remember passion and purpose....
so that was good.and today has been up and down, my friend jamie is very very sick and i love her and it hurts to see her in pain, so i went with her to the doctor today and God was good to her, he gave her great doctors and i feel like i can trust her into God's hands....but you know days go up and down, and right now i'm frustrated...i can't really tell you why except i have this frustration inside me that i don't always know what to do with...life is unpredictable, you don't always have a choice what it throws at you....but i guess in the end, God is worth worshipping either, He still the only one with ALL the answers, so He's the one i should be talking to....He's still guiding us, but sometimes i worry that I'm like the israelites and forget all of God's goodness to me, i don't want to be like that..so in the midst of my frustration, anger, sadness I will praise God! I will trust that He loves my friends, my husband, my family even more than i do...i will praise Him..even when I don't understand ( because if i could understand God, what would be the point?? ) so yeah, this is somewhat rambling again, but i'm just not sure how where this is all going....so i guess i will go to sleep and pray that God speaks to me, that He draws near to me because I need Him..i desperately need Him. the picture above i took..and i call it 'Hope'